This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
