We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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