Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize