I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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