Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize