My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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