I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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