Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
