can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
