lets start a swedish sibling band together
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.