Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
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