my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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