I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Need sex. Gaining weight.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
did i walk over a car last night?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
