i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
