Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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