the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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