His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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