Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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