Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
