At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize