The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
