I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.