Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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