I showed him my bush... on skype.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
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We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
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I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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