their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
