my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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