In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
