it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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