Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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