I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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