Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize