If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize