you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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