I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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