Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
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If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
what is it with giant penises always finding me
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
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