one two three fourrrrnication!
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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