I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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