is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
