is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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