I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
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I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
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Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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