He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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