Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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