I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
