all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
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