I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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