if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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