He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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