i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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