Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize