i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
